Now that we have sheltered at home, worked from home, and our children have school at home, it’s time for a little humorous reflection. A special thanks to my friend and former barber, Milo.
This sheltering at home stuff is starting to get to me!
1. Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.
2. I used to spin the toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I’m cracking a safe.
3. I need to practice social distancing from . . . the refrigerator.
4. Still haven’t decided where to go for Easter . . . The Living Room or The Bedroom.
5. PSA: every few days, try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believing all is well in the kingdom.
6. Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job!
7. I don’t think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we’d go from Standard Time to Twilight Zone.
8. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into the house, told my dog . . . we laughed a lot.
9. So, after this quarantine, will the producers of My 600 Pound life just find me or do I find them?
10. Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business!
11. My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.
12. Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.
13. I’m so excited . . . it’s time to take out the garbage. What to wear, what to wear?
14. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyardia. I’m getting tired of Los Livingroomia.
15. Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks women with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.
16. Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said “I hope I don’t have the same teacher next year. I was insulted!
And this one:
APR
About the Author:
I am a cybersecurity and IT instructor, cybersecurity analyst, pen-tester, trainer, and speaker. I am an owner of the WyzCo Group Inc. In addition to consulting on security products and services, I also conduct security audits, compliance audits, vulnerability assessments and penetration tests. I also teach Cybersecurity Awareness Training classes. I work as an information technology and cybersecurity instructor for several training and certification organizations. I have worked in corporate, military, government, and workforce development training environments I am a frequent speaker at professional conferences such as the Minnesota Bloggers Conference, Secure360 Security Conference in 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, the (ISC)2 World Congress 2016, and the ISSA International Conference 2017, and many local community organizations, including Chambers of Commerce, SCORE, and several school districts. I have been blogging on cybersecurity since 2006 at http://wyzguyscybersecurity.com